The Great Search for The Lost House Part IV: The Case of the Mistaken Identity!?

So after one hell of a long week, which dragged by so slow a turtle passed us along the way, we finally get “The Call!”

(dum dum dum dum)

I braced myself for the inevitable bad news… biting my lip, clenching my jaw, already heartbroken over words that hadn’t been spoken yet. I just knew it was bad news, horrible news!! I just knew the lady would let out a high pitch witches laugh and belt out…

“Yea, right! Let you buy one of our homes, you must be mistaken!”


To my surprise, the phone call didn’t go this way at all. Infact, the seemingly pleasant voice on the other end was gushing with good news. Starting with, “You may look at the house at your earliest convenience. Just let me know what date is good for you!”….. followed by “Might I add, their is another couple interested in it as well, so if you do like it, you will want to put a deposit down on it…..” (straight to my pockets!)

At this point, she began to over-fill me with information, monthly amounts, square footage, no fence, home owners committee, property tax, bedrooms, bathrooms, fireplace, etc….

(Again, I haven’t even seen the house yet, and now I know more than I may need to!)

So I respectfully intervene with one simple question. One that I thought should have been discussed in the beginning of the call, before figures were thrown out, before square footage was discussed!

“What happened with all the alleged evictions?”

After a long, awkward moment of silence, and a quick “paper-rustling” sound, she replies….

“Oh, that! Yea, I can’t get it taken off, you have to.” ….. (Well duh!) ….. “But you should most definitely follow up on that!” …. (No, really?) ….

Lost in the excitement, however, I didn’t think to follow that with…
“Did you get the dates?”
“Did you check the social security number?”
“What about the alleged addresses? Did you get those?”

I didn’t even think to ask what cleared it all with them. Something made them believe it wasn’t me. I’m sure it wasn’t my good looks and my word alone.

“So was it just A Case of Mistaken Identity afterall?”

Published in: on February 28, 2007 at 5:23 pm  Comments (3)  

The Great Search for the Lost House Part III: The Case of the Stolen Identity!!

You wouldn’t think things could have gotten any worse. Seriously, what else could possibly go wrong? …. (Sigh)


So here we sit, two weeks after this whole mess started, and we are no closer to a home than we were when we began, we aren’t any less confused than we were when we started, infact, the only thing that has changed is the stress level of our household!

Just when we thought nothing else could possibly go wrong, it did!

The “realtor” finally returns our calls and emails, only for us to find out…The worst thing anyone could ever possibly hear, at the worst possible moment ever for it to happen!…..

Apparently someone has stolen my identity. Yes, you heard me right, MY IDENTITY!!!

Can you imagine?

You work hard at building your credit, you pay bills you can’t afford to pay, and eat shit you didn’t want or even like because you didn’t have money for anything else….then what happens? Some loser, some good-for nothing loser….who has probably already ruined their own credit, begins screwing with yours!!

Come to find out…. I, who have lived in only two houses my entire adult life, three including my parents home…..Have 14…. Count them….. 14 Evictions on my credit. (What?) (Not Possible!)

14 Evictions??

I have never been evicted from one place, let alone 14!

The crazy part?

Yea, all 14 evictions have appeared only in the past 6 months! Think about that for a moment!!! Do you realize, I would have had to get evicted more than twice a month to equal 14 in 6 months?! How the hell is that even possible? Is it even feasible?


So yet again, we have found another bump in the road to trip over… another rut in the street to fall in….. another detour sign along our way to stray us off our path and only created to get us lost!


Published in: on February 23, 2007 at 12:34 am  Comments (1)  

The Great Search for the Lost House Part II: The Long Wait

Ok, so we’ve all been there….

Looking for your dream home in a pile full of  “I don’t think so” and “Were they for real?” which is after trudging through the “You can’t be serious!” and “How much did they want for that shack?”…..

We finally find this gorgeous 3 bedroom ranch home in a quiet little housing edition, on a dead end cul-de-sac, in a great school district, and surrounded by some of the nicest neighbors anyone could ask for. Seriously this house has the perfect location! Not too mention it is one of very few places that accept pets! (Which I have two big, cuddly pups!)

We take the appropriate steps in contacting the correct people. Which included the all-too-young, working for her daddy, doesn’t really need the money to give a damn, realtor who would answer each and every thing I said with “Mmm, kay!” …..
“I was calling about your lease to own program”..”Mmm, kay”…
“I wanted to get the appropriate forms”…”Mmm, kay”…
“I would like to look at a specific house”….”Mmm, kay”….

(Give me a freakin’ break lady, we are new to this and would like some sort of guidance….Sheesh!)

We printed, filled out, and faxed back all of the appropriate paperwork needed to move. Including, but not limited to, two copies each: Rental Application, Landlord Verification, and Employment Verification. Which might I add, some of the paperwork was pointless.

What is the reasoning in having our landlord fill out two of the exact same documents for the exact same place, when we have both lived here together all these years?….What is the reasoning in having me print out an Employment Verification form for myself when I clearly stated I did not work? And why the hell are we even filling out paperwork when we can’t even get you up here to show us the damn house?…..

So after one full week of waiting (after being told it would take a mere 3 days) I have yet again emailed her wondering about the progress. Now after two emails, a few phone calls, and all the paper work faxed… we have yet to get a return call from this place.


So I figure, I will give it until Friday before burning her phone line up with eager calls. (I am good at that!) And believe me, the last thing she wants is me unhappy on the other line. (lol)

Published in: on February 21, 2007 at 8:01 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Great Search For The Lost House: The Beginning!

The Great Search for the lost house

Emotions were running high, stress and tension filled the air like the musky old smell of the drunken hobo, who always asked for some coins as you passed.

The car was closing in quickly on me, the space feeling smaller and smaller. There was nowhere to run, no retreat insight. The argument was coming to a head, there was no stopping it by this point. All we could hope for was the grace of God to shut him up before he spewed anymore vile words upon us that he couldn’t take back. 

“I hope you brought your boots, because the shit is running deep today!!”

Now by this point, I know you’re all wondering what the hell I am talking about. What my very point may be. So let me go back to where it all started. To the very moment that led to all of this and bring you up to speed.

Unknowingly, last Saturday night, I sat at this very same computer checking my mail before heading to bed, not knowing what those next crucial moments held in store for me.

So as I sent that last email and was just about to sign off…I received a call that would be a slap in the face. There were family discrepancies going on and I now had a few short weeks to find a house and move.

Panic set in. What would we do? The money we had planned to buy a second car with (a much needed second car) and new furniture (for the first time in 7 years) we now had to put on a house. A house we had no idea where to find.

We financially were stuck in between a rock and a hard place. Although we could financially make it, my dear hubby has no credit. Not bad credit, not derogatory credit, just no credit. You wouldn’t think that would be a problem! Come to find out, it is a BIG problem!

No credit is worse than bad credit. Surprise, surprise!

No one cares that I have excellent credit, it doesn’t matter. I do not have income therefore my credit is null and void pretty much. 

So here we are. Having to except that now we must rent or lease a house instead of buying. Which was a major jab at both our prides. The dear ol’ hubbies, especially.

Excepting failure is never easy!

Now we sit, in what now seems like much too small of a car, bickering back and forth. Over nothing important, just meaningless little stuff. Voices are beginning to escalate, the tones are beginning to base… (Which I must say now, isn’t what I wanted.) But inevitable to say the least.

Words are starting to be thrown, harsh comments are now being made, accusations are being slung left and right. Yet what brings my car to a screeching hault? What were the words spoken that made me cringe with shear anger? What was it that ate through me like an acid spill on human flesh?

“If it wasn’t for your mom, none of this would be going on!”

Even now, thinking back to the moment in order to write this blog, I become angry all over. Like my mother can be blamed for our misfortune. Sheesh!

What did he think he would solve by saying that? What did he think he would accomplish by uttering such words? Did he think that I would just say, “You’re so right honey, let’s burn the bitch at the stake!”

My mother may have some bearing on why we decided to move, but I beg him to explain where she played a part in his lack of credit! Or where she is hindering us on finding a place to move!

So at this point, after a long moment in silence. I look at him with my closest impression of the “eat shit and die” look and I say in a clear and calm, but very hateful tone, “The Great Search for the Lost House is over! We are going home!!”

Needless to say, his stay in the dog house hasn’t been a pleasant one!

Published in: on February 20, 2007 at 3:37 am  Comments (1)